We just moved for the second time in less than a year, and I want everything settled. I wake up with strange thoughts on my mind: “I wonder if the kids’ soccer stuff should go with winter wear downstairs or in the upper hall closet?”
I usually don’t spend a lot of thought on things like that.
And in the midst of this upheaval, it seems like my mind wants to worry on other unfinished matters: unsettled relationships, questions about this upcoming school year—on and on. “A place for everything and everything in its place,” this stranger mind says, “so what are we going to do about you not having called your grandmother in months? You need to fix this.”
God keeps whispering the Amplified version of Psalm 46:10 to me. “Let be.” “Be still.” “Know that I am GOD!”
More familiar versions leave that implied first part off, but it’s the part I’m hearing loudest of all. “Let it be, Jen. Let be.” Be all right with the chaos in your house. Remember that relationships are between fallen, messed-up people; they require a LOT of grace. An orderly life is not the equivalent of a “full, abundant” life.
Things will NEVER, this side of heaven, be perfect and settled, though right now I really want them to be. Actually, it helps when I realize that my desire for this perfection and order is truly my deep heart cry for the Perfect One. When I don’t wholeheartedly pursue Him, and instead become obsessed with creating complete order in my life, I’m actually creating chaos in my soul.
Far better to have some chaos in my home and in my life than chaos in my soul.
So even though I DO have to get my house settled, even though my life, with four/six kids, is always going to be kind of crazy, I will practice this verse.
“Let be and be still and know (recognize and understand) that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations! I will be exalted in the earth!”
And I will start with letting be.