Psalm 139:23-24: David shows such boldness before God—to ASK that his faults be revealed. It is a terrifying thing to request others (anyone) to tell you the faults they see in you. But David can do this because he has full trust that God will be gracious and loving—in both the revealing of the sin AND the sanctification that must follow.

He asks, too, because he has learned that he (David) cannot know himself. I understand this more and more as I get older. I look back at the past and see areas of sin that I never recognized as such in the actual time. My self-centeredness and pride pushed me to give up on relationships that no longer felt important or convenient; they caused me to use people rather than love them. Though my sins are clear to me now, they weren’t in the moment.

I don’t want this to be a constant in my life—to find only in hindsight the sin that was there all along. But what also becomes clear in looking back is the beautiful redemption of God in spite of—or because of—my sin. I see how He healed hurts, repaired relationships, gave second chances, worked GOOD, and only then, sometimes, revealed my hidden faults.

Because all this is true, I can be more open to seeing my sin in the now, more vulnerable with God. I can pray with David, trusting in the gentleness of a God who is all about restoration, all about redemption, “Search me [thoroughly], God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”